A Guide to Mumdom

I'm looking for a new self help book, 'A guide to Mumdom' or more specifically 'A guide to 2 year old boys'.

Girls I have just about got to grips with, I just suggest/expect what I would like/have done and 50% of the time I'm right, 50% of the time its the exact opposite.  No great surprises.  Boys on the other hand (or to be exact, my one) have me flummoxed.

The type to book I want is direct. Not the kind which offers help, advice and hope on every continuing page only to completely wimp out at the very end with teeny tiny print on the final page with something completely annoying like "well, hee hee, of course these past 12 chapters are all just based on my experience, every child is different, so just go with what you think best".

No! I want a no holds barred, THIS is what you should do to get THESE results in the style of Paul Hollywood, Henry VIII and Jesus Christ where if you don't follow their rules you are a fool only to yourself and will receive a very withering "What do you expect?!?!?" look along with your rubbish result (e.g. dry bake, getting your block knocked off or a rather too warm eternity).

So the chapters I really want to read about are how to deal with/put an end to:

1. A constant need to whack (his words) everything that moves (primarily his sister)
2. A constant need to hold an iPhone/ipad
3. A constant need to snack
4. A constant need to watch Peppa Pig
5. A constant need to whine when none of the above are readily possible

Now I know what your thinking, this guy needs to get out more, do some sticking and painting, tramp in some leaves and read some books.  This sounds like we don't do much, we do! We walk, have adventures, we play, we attend groups and we have quiet time but the above is normally taking place at the same time.

So please please please please (recurring with a dot on top) if you know the existence of this holy tome,  can you just quietly tell me?

Let's be friends.

The last few weeks have been tough, and there's not a sign of it lulling soon. Husband is so busy with work at the moment I barely see him, just an evening here or there and when he's here, he's not etc etc blah blah.  Also its pretty normal for us to spend the evening watching tv, both on iPads or laptops or phones, texting, emailing, tweeting and the odd sentence or banal piece of information passed between us here or there.   So, in a spark of inspiration I decided we needed a 'no technology' date at home this week.

It was nothing special but was very much so. We didn't pick up a phone or touch a computer, had dinner at the table (as opposed to our laps on the sofa) and we didn't stop talking.  It was lovely.  It all went back to normal the next day but dems da breaks.  It'll happen again soon.

But this week has had other little sparks of magic in it too.  A mummy at school I've never really spoken to stopped me in the street to introduce herself and say hi, another from toddler group made a beeline to speak to me and then requested me as a friend on Facebook. I had an amazing conversation with a lady at toddler group about her faith which really focussed me and I had an invitation to an evening out with other mums.

All these events may seem small but felt like such a huge gift to me this week, even though I've never found it hard to make conversation with strangers (part of the job) and have a certain amount of confidence, moving away from where you grew up is tough.  Yes most of the people in my village have known each other for years but Ive realised it doesn't matter, people (most of them anyway) are naturally interested and want to like and be liked by other people and it just takes someone to make the first move, say hi and there you go, a relationship starts and a friendship can blossom from there.

Even though Husband is away working today, the picture below captures my (however brief) feeling of contentment this afternoon with the little ones bonding have a cosy time (with the cat) watching Annie.*

* This didn't last long, it descending into CHAOS when he then started pummelling her with cushions, me shouting and he got put on the naughty step

Hellloooo Wembley!

Hellllooooo Out There!! I'm Back. Welcome to the new, fresh, exciting, relaunch of StumblingMummy.  Hurray!! Huzzah!! Whoo hoo!! Whoop Whoop!! (thank you, thank you, you're too kind).

Ok. I've just changed the template design and some piccies.

BUT I've decided to start blogging again. Things feel a bit different; I've changed (well I've lost just over a stone), I'm no longer new to my village, my kiddiwicks are older (obvs), I've made fantastic new friends, joined the PTA, moved (mentally) away from some not so good friends, I've just taken part in my first 5K with army obstacles type run, joined twitter (I was opposed to it before, don't ask) and have some great things to look forward to.

However, I'm still very much stumbling and in a moment of realisation this morning thought perhaps this is what I need. A place to outpour my happiness and frustration, inspiration and questions. I'm also on instagram and have taken some quite arty shots of squirrels so I can show them off here too.

To get me going I thought I'd write a quick fire list of aims for the coming year in order to inspire me to post as much as possible:

1. Write the children's book I keep starting and send it to someone, somewhere to have a peek
2. Win the fight on limescale in my kitchen (its a hard water area)
3. Continue my ignoring approach of my 5 year olds' sudden vocal skills equal to a surly teenager (every other tactic has just resulted in my demise)
4. Be kinder to Husband and not resent his every moment away from the home
5. Build up my followers
6. Watch TV less (though obvious exceptions to the rule are XFactor, Easties, anything with Nigella and Kirsty, anything to do with real life A&E/Midwifery and Celebrity Jungle/Big Brother when they return)
7. Link up my blog with twitter
8. Be more patient (this is just one to make the number of aims even, I don't like odd numbers)

There, that'll get things rolling - see you soon! x